Letting People In


I’ve been having a running conversation for the last few weeks with a friend of mine.  We’ve been discussing finding our “Real Equal” or our “True Partner“, and we’re exploring the different facets of what a “Real Equal” looks like to each of us.

So far, we’ve covered:

  • Intellectual Equals – I had mine briefly but he’s never had his
  • Social Equals – again I had mine – Husband No. 2 – but he’s never had his
  • Emotional Equals – we hit the skids there.  Go figure …

He admits he has never found his Emotional Equal and I admit the same.  But he’s much more brave than I am.  He says he has let a woman all the way “in” and been hurt.  I admitted I’ve never let any man all the way “in”.

And guess what?

I’ve been hurt, too.  Devastated in fact.  Our conclusion is that letting people in doesn’t tip the scales one way or the other.  The risk of being hurt remains the same.  The risk of having the relationship be short term remains the same.

I’m sitting with the fact that the risk of being hurt doesn’t have anything to do with whether or not we allow someone “in” to our emotional inner sanctum.  If it doesn’t matter, wonder why some of us are so afraid of it?

In the meantime, he and I still have more facets to explore.  When we’re done with the components of our “Real Equal”, I guess we’ll discuss whether or not such a purple glitter Unicorn actually exists.

Man, I just adore people with the Warrior Spirit who are fearless in self-exploration and self-evaluation! Who knew he and I would travel through decades only to find that we’re kindred spirits?

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